The Cold Penguin

expanding the box

To do and not to do

on September 18, 2013

So my toe is still a black and blue mess.  I can’t wear any shoes other than flip-flops without incredible pain and a very noticeable limp.  And I’m trying not to aggravate other aspects of my foot by walking funny to lessen the pain of my toe.  But other than that, it’s actually better and I’m still hoping for a fairly quick healing.  I’m getting antsy from being so still!

I’m sure I’m late on the bandwagon with this, as I am with most things, but I just now read the article 23 Things Every Woman Should Stop Doing.  And I can see myself or other women I know in every single thing listed in the article.

My big things:

#1 – Apologizing all the time.  Sometimes I just say “I’m sorry” to my husband for no apparent reason other than I’m feeling bad about myself and want to apologize to him for my dismay.  I didn’t snap or whine, I just felt down so I apologized to him.  There’s no need for the constant apologizes.

#3 – Saying “no” to yourself.  I’m getting better at this but I still need improvement.  I give myself pep talks and try to silence the voices in my head telling me not to do something for whatever reason it comes up with.  Really, if you come up with the idea to do something because it sounds interesting or fun, do it.  Why would you try to talk yourself out of something enjoyable?

#5 – Body snarking.  Yep, I’m guilty.  I look at myself critically in the mirror at least once a day.  It’s sad.

#15 – Web-MD’ing everything.  I’m so guilty of this when it comes to anything skin related.  Case in point.  I look down at my wrist today and notice a “white head” looking bump.  I immediately grab the computer and search online for 20 minutes on anything it can be.  Most likely, it’s an ant bite – I was around ants just before I noticed it.  But I’m always afraid it’s some weird parasite that’s going to cause irreparable harm to me.  If I have an illness or injury, I don’t worry.  But anything odd on my skin and I go nuts.

A few of my own:

#1 – Don’t judge yourself for NOT working out.  If I have a day or two that I don’t hit the gym, I feel instantly like I’ve gained 5 lbs and am a lazy slob.  Even today, with my toe injury preventing me from even wearing sneakers which are necessary to exercise, I feel like a failure for not working out.  And I work out more days than not, so I really should give myself the peace of mind that taking a day off is ok.

#2 – Don’t always look for the negative.  I do this in almost every situation involving myself.  I find faults of my own, whether it’s appearance, social or intelligences related, I find the smallest thing to hate.  A zit, an awkward laugh or a fumble in words.  These things happen to everyone and make us human, but for some reason I feel like I should be perfect, aka inhuman.

Really, when you look at the article list and my few extra, it’s all very simple.  You need to accept yourself for who you are and not give in to expectations, whether they are real or imagined.  Be you.  Be happy.  Be healthy.  Three very simple statements that are very difficult to actually translate into behavior.  But we can do it, a step at a time.

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